My account of life both on and off of two wheels...... "At least I'm enjoying the ride"

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I think it is time.

Although this has not been done intentionally- I have been holding onto my hair.  Yes my hair that I was and still am planning on sending into Locks of Love. I didn't really mean to hold onto it this long, really I did not.  

If you recall back in July, I took control of the inevitable. My chemo induced hair loss.  I cut it short and saved the ponytail to send into Locks of Love.  Two weeks later in August, I had my second treatment and my hair started falling out rapidly so I went for the buzz cut.   Things seemed a bit manic those days and I usually felt horrible on the days following treatment so after I had come back from the salon with my ponytail, I just put it in a zip lock bag and set it on a shelf.  While I was reorganizing things  a month or so ago, I stumbled upon it.  I thought about not opening the bag but I couldn't resist.  There is was.  My beautiful ponytail.  I ran my fingers through it, held it up to the light to see the beautiful colors and thought- Oh how I miss this hair.  Wait, this is so weird.  I have to mail this right away.  I scratched my bald head, thought about my beautiful hair and put it back in the envelope ready to mail but left it unsealed.  Life got busy and than I forgot again....damn it.  Is it chemo brain or can I just not let go of this ponytail?

Do you know how much i loved my long hair? I did. If I were to be vain about myself physically, one of the two things would have been my long hair.

Over the past month my hair has started to grow back pretty quickly.  I wish my eyebrows and eyelashes would come back quicker but all in due time. 
See...it's growing!

I think it is time to let go and allow for "new growth".  During this whole cancer process, somethings have been harder than others to let go of.  I thought I would be thicker skinned with the hair loss but frankly, I'm over being bald or worrying about covering up my head in public.  At least it is wool hat season!
 
The envelope is sealed and ready to go.

2 comments:

  1. When I first met Aleksandra she had a shaved head too. She shaved it to the skin when she left Poland due to a bad hair color job. She can be a bit extreme sometimes, LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  2. That is extreme Bill but if given the choice, I would NEVER shave my head again. I miss my braids :(

    ReplyDelete